Moment by Moment

So... as you can tell from the gap between December 18 and today, I didn't succeed with my Post-a-Day in 2011. Honestly, I'm pretty happy that I made it all the way to the 352nd day of the year. New Years Resolutions, as I understand, usually don't make it past February or March. So yay.

And now I'm sitting here at the airport on Ash Wednesday- another day when people start "resolutions". This year, I didn't make any New Years Resolutions, and I've been trying to think of something to give up for Lent over the past week, and really haven't landed on anything. SIDE: Lent doesn't really hold any spiritual significance for me- I treated it like a 46 day (I don't give myself a break on Sundays as is done in traditional Lent) opportunity for a secondary New Years Resolution. And really, as I reflect on these first couple of months of 2012, Lent/NYR doesn't quite fit where the Lord has me.

See, He's been revealing to me lately the importance of, and my absolute need of, taking things one moment at a time. I know that sounds a bit cliche and "carpe diem"-esque... but that's really not what it is. I mean in terms of striving for holiness, walking in the Spirit, living in surrender, abiding in Jesus. It's so easy for us to say things like "Lord, I will NEVER do _____ again!" or "Lord, help me to be so filled with the Spirit that I never leave Your side til the day I die!" And I suppose the intention is good- we really shouldn't sin, ever again, and we really should walk fully in the power of the Holy Spirit for a lifetime... But if we're being realistic, the choice to live in the Spirit and not in the flesh is made moment by moment. And if I think of too long a time period, and too long of a commitment like the "Lord, I will NEVER do _____ again!", it's really rather overwhelming. The reality is, I don't have the power on my own to make such commitments. But I CAN choose to trust in the Lord every hour of every day. Whenever my heart begins to wander (ALL the time), I can stop, release my selfish desires/frustrations/distractions to Jesus, and let go of all control to the leading of the Holy Spirit- the very Person of God Himself living in me! And if I wander to the point of sinning in a significant way (which, if we're honest, will probably happen often), then I don't torture myself over having tained my commitment to 70 years of spotless living with one blemish... Instead, I can hand that over to the Lord, who isn't surprised by my mistakes and shortcomings, who keeps reminding me that Christ's death and resurrection have already completely paid for my sins and my sin- for every sinful act/thought/word, and even for my overall state of depraved sinfulness. It's DONE.

If this isn't how I live, then I'm setting myself up for self-hate, torture, and works-drivenness. So, Lord, I want to choose to live by Your strength, moment by moment. And I need You even just in making that choice moment by moment. Thank You for the reminder in Your Word that if I say I have no sin, I am a liar. That it's better to just be honest about my sin and confess it to You because when I do, You promise to forgive me my sin and cleanse me of all righteousness. Man... that's awesome.

So yeah, this year, I'm not gonna lent. It's not that Lent is a bad thing. It's just that right now, where I am in my walk with the Lord, I need to not make these time-based commitments to do or not do certain things. I'm still learning how to walk in the Spirit day by day!